Subject: Return of the rattlesnake. Wed Feb 26, 2014 5:09 am
King:Hello, ladies and Gentlemen and THIS is Monday night RAW!
JR: It's gonna be a slobberknocker, King. A night after the ruthless Bully Ray stole the Pay per view Fughedaboutit. We're here though to keep the ball rollin' and keep the show the way it's been for many years. ENTERTAINING!
King: We got the main event tonight with Dean Ambrose and Randy Orton, two of the most badass, entertaining superstars in the business. If you wanna take a look at the top TEN most badass superstars you can check WCF.COM for the list.
JR: Well, King, I believe we have a special guest heading to the ring soon, nobody knows who it will be, I mean, could be Randy Orton or Dean Ambrose themselves.
Then.... *GLASS BREAKS*.
* The crowd errupts into cheers as Stone Cold walks out onto the ramp, raising his arms in the air.
JR: BAH GAWD! IT CAN'T BE! STONE COLD HAS RETURNED. BAH GAWD, THE LOUD MOUTH, BUH- LAWD JESUS!
King: What in god's name is he doin' here?
*Stone cold grips his Mic and begins to speak, nodding, waiting for the crowd to settle down.
" />
Stone Cold:Settle down. Settle down. Alright, here's what I wanna say... By god, it's great to be back!
*Crowd cheers and claps. Stone cold then waiting for them to settle again and then speaking*
Stone Cold: Alright, lets see. I've been away, takin' a break from wrestin'. But, sometimes you realize yer place, and my place is in this ring, whoppin' ass and laying down a talking to, to any son' bitch that needs a talkin to...... I ain't gonna lie, I miss errythang about the W-C-F, the stupid idiots in costumes *COUGH* Super *COUGH* Liger * COUGH* Sorry, got a sore throat t'day. You know I miss the "badasses". The same badasses that are below me in that top 10 list on WCF.com, ya see Stone Cold Steve Austin ranks number one on that list fer a good reason. There's a reason I own the name, the king of badass, the texas rattlesnake, it's because I don't let any S.O.B get past me when I'm in this ring. I make sure this ring is Stone Cold's and that I am the one who drinks the beer in the ring, I am the one who kicks fruity tooty asses in this ring.
*Crowd Cheers and chants 2STONE COLD, STONE COLD". Then settling, allowing Austin to speak again.
Stone Cold: I got a little bitta whoopass I wanna lay out for ya, some truth for once. Not some bullshit comin' outta Steph Mcmahon's or maybe Jerry The King's mouth. I'mma tell you about the time when people didn't eat the sweetcorn outta erryone's shit. When the superstar's weren't a bunch of fairycakes tryna throw a punch. I'm talkin' about when everyone in that locker room wanted to break your bones and grind yer flesh. Maybe, I can try again to get these wimps some balls and get them to put on a GODDAMN GOOD SHOW! Cuz' if I'm honest, I've been sitting on my ass watching a comedy show on my T-V screen. Hell, I used my Royale Rumble D-V-D as a beer mat and I used it to wipe my stanky ass crack.
* The crowd laughs, stone cold smiles slightly, then rubbing his goatee and then speaking again.*
Stone Cold: Ya know, steph said that tah me once. "Steve, your too rough cut, your too tenacious for the modern WCF. Well, you know what I did? *WHAT?* I said, you know I did? *WHAT?*. Well, I'll tell ya what I did, I sipped my beer *WHAT?* then I spat it back out in her face *WHAT?* and I gave here one o' these!
*Stone Cold waves his middle finger in the air, marching around the ring.
*Austin Marches around the ring, talking down his mic, waving his middle finger*
Stone Cold: I tell ya what I also did, I trashed her office! I took on her men! I fought off three guys for my shot at the U-S Title! Fair enough I blew it and injured my leg, but now, 3 months later I stand here... WAVING MY FINGER! *What?* Opening cans o' whoopass *What?* I'm movin' my leg jus' fine! *What?* and I ain't gonna do what anyone in the locker room tells me, I ain't gonna do what the commentator's tell me, I ain't gonna do what the autority tells me! I sure as hell ain't gonna do what Stephanie Mcmahon tells me, Oh, and I ain't gonna do what Bully Ray tells me. From now on, the only voice is stone cold's. The voice of the idiotic but sure as hell brave son' bitches of America. Now, someone throw me a beer!
*Stone cold Catches two incoming beers, then doing his signature beer clash in the ring, necking the beer as it falls, then tossing the beer cans in the crowd, his theme playing.
